I See Now, I Should've Realized A Lot Sonner..

I look to your beautiful, vast green eyes and see the shadow of a girl I once have know as Tori.. Yet, my silence has earned me the right to lose myself in fate. Fate that will ultimately kill me inside leaving me defenseless to your final knife in my back. My heart cannot be healed from your simple betrayal because you have pierced the deepest fathoms of my soul.. Leaving me to wonder.. Did I ever matter to you? You threw me aside like a piece of shit. You used me to show that you were able to do whatever you want.. I was used.. It never bothered you that you dropped me like nothing ever happened between us. Yet, inside I always wondered if I could save it or was fate the knife that cut us apart.. I really will never know.

The knife of fate is sharp and judgmental. It chooses it victims, but not it's saviors.

We are all meant to die.

I know this now.

Why not steal the knife of fate and slit my wrist.. bleed the eternal love I had ever felt for you out. Drain me of my fears and anxiety.

And if you judge me. You are pathetic, not me. I am actually able to express my emotions while you fake and lie to make yourself seem perfect.. Honestly, I don't give a fuck.

I'm not perfect. I can live with that.

Every day we fall, we have learned the easiest way to crawl. Stay down on our knees but we're still moving forward. Never did I think that we were so weak. I never realized what we learned was a lie. So I'll take bare this on my mind, and take it with every stride. It's a brand new day. But it's all the same in every way! I'm gonna drown, I scream so loud. But it doesn't make a sound. So save me now. I'm learning the answers to explain this emotional cancer. It spreads through me, the infection of the lonely. I can still breathe but for only heartbeat. I need a hero to save me. Show me what I never learned. How to love and how to burn. How to live and how to ignore their concern.

The Angel walks among the blood of the hopeless collecting their souls. These souls were so alone in the cruel world that was supposed to be home. The pain built and built till one joke, one tease, one last thing later it boiled and spilled. They ended it all with a final fall and a scream that could be heard down the hall. He passes locked doors, notes, and razors to heal the souls, to be their savior. He stands by as the fire department knocks down the bathroom door. Gazes at the parents gaping at what lays on the floor. The towel soaks to red as they try to save the unfortunate girl, the tears start flowing and the room starts to whirl. The Angel wraps his midnight wings around the girls soul to help reasure, that the choice was wrong. She could've endured. She thought her dying would stop hers and their pain, but she was wrong, it only amplified all the same. He holds her down, she may not pass through the golden gates of Heaven, nor the door of Hell. She is chained to this Earth to see her mistake take it's effect. It tears her apart to see the tears at the funeral. She regrets her choice, but they'll never hear her voice. But she and the others can never go back cause when your heart stops beating it all falls to black wings on The Suicide Angel.

Forever human wreckage,