Right Next Door to Amityville Horror

Do you believe in ghost?

Well, at least I want to believe that it is true. I have never seen one with my own eyeballs nor feel or smell the scent of one, heck I never even encounter a strange happening in my whole fucking life but if you consider scamming hot transvestite in the middle of the night as a paranormal activity then maybe yeah.

But right until now I am still a paranormal virgin and no ghost or apparition has yet to pop my fucking cherry.

[I had something planned for this week entitled Fast & Furiously Trying to Get Laid but something came up and I thought I blog about this first]

This morning as I was watering my spice garden (which only consist of mint plants and more mint plants), I happened to strike up a conversation with one of the kindergarten teachers who was working next door. (Yeah, I live next to a Kindergarten, it is a great place to find a hot girl who would tolerate you when you feel like acting like a 5 year old) I was asking her if she knew about all the ruckus that was going on a month ago with the house behind me. And a shocking revelation was unfold to me, it seem that the house is haunted. No one really talks about it but everyone knows that it is the Amityville of this area. Five fucking families have lived there and all of them moved out within a month. Another common thing about the families is that they are all Indians. You might think that Prima Facie-ly this is because of the irresponsible money-hunger Chinese Realtor that thinks the Indians are suckers for haunted houses. But the true fact is this Chinese Realtor is actually very responsible for only letting Indian family in that haunted house because it goes without saying that Indian is somewhat immune to ghost because it is generally assume that ghosts can’t see them at night. Then again the exorcism (if needed) perform by the Indian is by far the cheapest of the other races here. Come on, how much do you think a few sheets of banana leaves cost? As for a full blown Chinese exorcism, just by asking advice from them, it would cost you a red packet containing nothing less than RM888.88 (a very auspicious figure to the fucking Chinese) and did you know that it will cause you a bomb if you are required to burn paper effigies to appease the fucking spirits which I think it is more like appeasing the blood leeching exorcist than the ghost. Come on who you think the Realtor would let the house to if they are liable for exorcism cost. Take a guess, take a wild guess…

I was greatly disappointed because I've moved in a house next to a haunted house and not into one. You know the fucking feeling of being one number short of the jackpot or having some fucking idiot shout “Bingo” when you are already so close to winning. I feel cheated, just because my skin isn’t black, I’m not always drunk and I don’t reek of coconut oil, it doesn't mean I don't wanna move in a haunted house.

But what is done is done, but that doesn't kill my fascination for that haunted house. I believe every evil has a beginning even Lord Lucifer started as a choir Boy in God’s choir. That is why I really wanna know more about what is going on in that house and also the history and when it started becoming haunted.

Now I fucking feel like Sam & Dean from Supernatural but the only difference is I'm not that good looking, I'm alone & my car booth isn’t filled with guns armed with salt rock shells. But that ain't gonna stop me from getting to the bottom of it.