Tailor-Made for Penis Erection

playing on my iPod:
House of Jazz - AC/DC

It was a dull and boring Wednesday afternoon at Malibu's Bar; unattractive over-sized women draped in undersized clothes (think over-filled chinese meat dumplings "BAK CHANG") was floating around the bar like house flies hovering around heaps of trash looking for a juicy pile of crap to lay maggots.

*Yawns. Excuse my rudeness, but recalling that particular moment bored the fucking shit outta me.

I was down to my second glass of Long Beach Tea when I fucking saw her. Artificial blonde, black tube and an arm band tattoo; thick ass and pointy tits that look like she got it from a high class silcone grocery store. With a face of a Seraph and the body of a Succubi, she sat right next beside me. It was too fucking easy, just like a juicy piece of top grade choice cut placed in front of a famished cannibal, she was ready to be taken in.

You know I could smell her fucking hair and it gave me the thrill; her collar bones were sending me the chills and her fucking hips could make me fill…fill a cup full of semen juice. She stands for everything God have created women for, she was solely made for one fucking reason. Just like the Mother Teressa of all hard on's. She was tailored-made by the fucking divine to give men of all age, size and race a full frontal penile erection. Damnit, these are fucking days when every men with functioning penises are glad to be men. It was also the day when finally a wrenched like me agrees and understood God in the Holy Fucking Bible, when he said in Genesis 1:28 “Be fruitful and increase in number”. Seriously, you don't have to be a fucking bible scholar to understand that bible verse. Well, if you don't, here's the translation in layman terms… “Go Fuck”

But why God why? Fuck why? Why must it be on the day when I am still on a no-sex strike? Fuck that, I am so close yet so far. 11 more days to go before I remove the shrink wrapped around my penis and put it to full use.

*sigh. At the mean time, remember the mind is over the fucking matter and keep saying to myself…