How to Be An EMO Part 2

EMO Fashion

The EMO fashion isn’t that hard for a beginner to grasp, the wardrobe mainly consists of:

Black tees with hoods (preferable with band name or logo, to be worn on hot weather to show how non-conformist you are)

Black tees with short sleeve (preferable with band name or logo, to show off your cut writs)

Black/White shoes/runners (preferable with mismatched show lace to show how non-conformist you are)

Skinny jeans (preferable black or any dark color that can be passed as black)

Apart from the hairstyle that we have already covered in part 1 and clothing variation form the above, glasses too can be included (most often with square dark rims)

EMO fashion guru Anna [permission granted for posting this picture]

EMO Social life

An EMO’s social life mainly revolves around MySpace. MySpace is badly built social networking website offering, user-submitted network of EMO and Wannabe. Basically an EMO is also a MySpacewhore

Benefits of being a MySpacewhore:

Upload your personal information to allow stalkers and pedophiles to locate you easily.

Add pictures of Japanese anime characters and say that your horrible face is not internet friendly;

Sprinkle gigantic pictures all over the your page, so that it cannot even be view properly in the largest screen resolution on a standard computer;

Adding flashing Gif pictures to go with the another flashing background picture that would make the viewer‘s eyes go like this @.@

Add the loudest and most annoying song you can imagine and 4-5 videos, then ensure that they are all simultaneously launch just as the page is fully loaded.

Call everyone a nerd but get offended with someone calls you one;

Post your EMO pose shot (how to snap one, covered in part 1)

Add random people to your friends list;

Talk about random things and don’t follow any grammar rules;

tALk LiKe tHIs;

Comment on someone’s picture after they have left you a comment on yours even if you don’t think that they look “sOOOoo hAWt”

Leaving a short comment on your friend’s page with simple question like” how’s your day?” when you have just came back from school/work with your friend and have a pretty good idea of how the crappy day went.

Leaving crappy messengers on your friends page every 10 minutes and on the next day, ask them “if you seen the message I left you on your page”.

Positive use of MySpace:

As a married man, find hot girls to make friends with;

Making fun of MySpace

Making fun of Facebook

Cyber bullying, makes little EMOs cry

Spying on your Ex

Cheating on your husband

Being a jerk

Now that you are on your way in becoming one, you need to find a EMO nick which often looks like this : **xo{yournamehere}ox** or something like this yoUR_naME_hERE. So that you can use it in MySpace or MSN.

EMO writings

An EMO is never complete without keeping a diary and writing shitty poems; you can start an online diary with blogger, Livejournal , xangga…etc, so that you can write EMO post and rant about random things and assume people would give a shit.

Here’s an example of an EMO entry:

Dear DIE-ary

Mood: Apathy. My life is crashing down on me, my parents hate me, my friends hate me, my girlfriend hates me, even my boyfriends hate me. I swear, why can’t she love me, am I that unlovable? Why does she have to fall in love with a jerk and not me? My life is just a black abyss, you know, it is dark and it is suffocating. Grabbing hold of me and tightening its grip, tighter than a pair of my sister’s jeans, which look great on me by the way. My parents just don’t get me; they think I’m gay just because they saw me kiss a guy. Well, a couple of guys. But I mean it is the 2000s, can’t 2 or 4 guys make out with each other without being gay. I mean chicks dig this kind of thing anyways, just look at two cowboys in Brokeback Mountain. No one cares so I’ll be just off slitting my writs all the way up to my shoulders and taking my beloved painkillers with cheap beers while listening to all those cool bands I have. (That you never heard of) I don’t know diary, sometimes I think you are the only one that understands me, you’re my best friend….......I <3 you.

[Explanation of “<3”]

EMO on the internet tend to use a less than sign ( < ) and number three ( 3 ) to create a heart ; they use "

But as a matter of fact, this sign looks very much like a vagina attached to a pair of testicles.


It is a common misconception that EMOs don’t love; they actually do love and actually they crave for love but they think they are hated by everyone that is why they are such misleading creatures. The one who doesn’t love anything are GOTHs .


I am afraid this all I have time for in this post, I have left out the EMO music and how to write shitty poems part, but I will try to cover it in my future post. I would like to thank Anna, Evie’s sister for being so kind in providing me with all sort of information on the emo fashion sense in helping me with this post and to Evie too for introducing me to her sister. The “How to be an Emo”post is not intended to badmouth anyone but just serve as a introduction to the EMO subculture. No cyber bullying little EMOs was done in the process of making this post. Now I will leave you will the world’s first ever EMO, try guess who might that person be before scrolling down ….