I am lying down and trying so hard to disconnect, trying to forget about the world around me. Trying so hard to make believe that you are lying next to me; There are so many things that I want to tell you, yet you left me in such a hurry, leaving me still sober after all these years. How are you doing there without me? Because I am not doing too good without you here. Every day I see you in some other face, they crack a smile and talk a while and then try to take your place. But I just sit down here, thinking to myself, why am I still lingering on to something that isn’t there anymore, move on and try to find somebody else; it is not as though you just left me yesterday. But something that I just can’t explain, something beneath all this pain, tells me that I know I will see your face again. But years come and go, some of us have already changed our life but I still got nothing but only these memories. And if I have to carry these painful memories alone till the end of my days, please tell me I deserve to see your face again. These wound, they are self inflicted, I don’t really know, how my heart could withstand it. 5 years and I am still breathing but I am going to be strong and carry this pain with me, because it is going to be worth my while because I miss your kiss and I miss your smile and I am waiting for that day we will be together again.

Happy birthday my angel, it is not too long now…

xniquet's birthday playlist: my angel's birthday