xniquet's middle finger technology: July 2008

Reasons Why You Should get a Hooters Girl as your Girlfriend

You go in night after night and every time she passes you me, you feel like your crotch is hitting the table. You got this feeling inside your gut that she is feeling you. Every time she serves you, you swear to God that she is trying to seduce you by lowering herself to show you her boobies. Even though you dressed up like crap, smells like crap, you hands and mouth are greasy from all the hot wings that you’ve been having and your face is covered with hot sauce, still she smiles at me which totally gives you a boner. Fuck it man, this hooters girl totally digs me; you turn to your buddy and asked them, “ bro, I think that Hooter chic is totally feeeeeeeling me, see how she came over and ask me how the hot wings are… ”, he nods in agreement. And a thought races over your mind, I can do this, I can date a hooters girl, and it is not one of those I just wanna fuck you for the night type of dating, but having a Hooters girl as a girlfriend type of dating. So your mind races to justify your thoughts, what is the benefit of having a Hooters girl:

Being a Hooters, she most definitely know that the company uses their sex appeal to exploit men who comes in , hence she most likely treats men as objects - objects to be exploited for personal gain; which is exactly how guys treat women too. A relationship founded upon this mutual exploitation has been proven to be the most stable for sexual intimacy as well as the kinkiest, and well...simply the best. And Hooters girls are 7 times more likely to engage in threesomes with a co-worker. You know you might just get real lucky if she brings home a hot co-work for the night.

Hooters girls understand men better than any subset of women on this planet. Why? Because her work is to understand men and please men; they know exactly what we want: food, booze, and a boner, and she knows that's ALL we want. That's it. No Friday night Gossip Girl marathons, Wednesday night Sex in the City movie, no super expensive meals at some trendy Sushi or Vegan restaurant. She knows you hate that shit.

While her job requires her to maintain an anorexic figure with huge breast; you don't have to be that jerk boyfriend who has to forced to drop hints to encourage her to lose her fat self. Hints like… “Did your clothes shrink?”, “I didn't hear you throw up last night. Did you forget?" will be a thing of the past!! Yayy!!!

So after reading the reasons, does it justify your urge of getting a Hooters girl as your girlfriend today? Search deep down inside of you; do you want to have a fruitful relationship as mentioned above? You know you do and deep down inside, you have this crush on a Hooters girl, so what are you waiting for. Go pick up a Hooters Girl today. But if you are a nerd who combs your hair sideways, has glasses as big as your monitor and still surf porn late at night just so that your wouldn’t be caught by your mother, Fear now, tutorial on how to pick up a Hooters Girl will be published soon. :)

When I Grow up, I wanna be a Hooters Girl

I Can Hardly Wait

Just under a month to go, i will be heading to Philly to watch Nine Inch Nails' Lights Over North America's Tour. It sure hell has been a long time coming but till then i will try not to get myself kill , at least after the concert that is...

Annoucement to All Hackers Wannabe

I am sorry but i am just tired of sending replies asking you to check your email password because you have just been dupe. So here is the list of people (See Below)i haven't notify. Please change your password or i might just drop in your mail just to check in on you :P

Have a nice day- Mr. X

If you remember sending an email here b01syspswd@gmail.com and your name is on this list, you know what to do...

LEAVE DAWN ALONE!!!

With all angry mobs turning against her, I am surprise that there isn’t any “Leave Dawn Alone” video being made by her fan or pseudo-fans (what the fuck are her agent or publicist thinking? Quick she needs some damage control here, look at what Britney’s publicist done for her. If you are planning of cutting cost maybe you can use back Chris Crocker’s video and dubbed it with another audio to make it Dawn’s). The fact of the matter is this whole thing is just a bunch of sour grapes trying to get people’s attention, and they church it up by blaming on Plagiarism. So what if she did plagiarize? Like it even matters, unless of course someone forces you to read what she writes or in this case what other writes which in turn was deemed to be written by her. As a big fan of Dawn Yang, I go in her blog from time to time but never read a single word, I just skip the ones with lotsa of words and stick to the pictures of her. Come on, you got to be kidding me right? Guys go in to her blog isn’t there to read what she wrote but to see her hot pictures, so does plagiarizing other people quotes or writing really matters? I guess not. So to those who still want to preach about it, let me tell you this. You are preaching to the wrong choir, because, as long as there are hot and sexy pictures of her posted on her blog, there would be flock of horny guys like me drooling all over the monitor. I know it is depressing for those traffic hunger mongers but still ain’t getting anywhere bloggers who really knows how to write a good and original post but looks butt ugly which no amount of plastic surgery can help. All I can say is better luck in your next life. As for people like me - butt ugly and doesn’t know how to write, I can only come up with a suggestion to Dawn’s KissBangClap this:

Since no one is reading it why don’t they turned it into something like icanhascheeseburger.com and instead of having lolz cats, we are going to have a whole new range of lolz dawns, which is pleasant to the eyes and easy on the brain. Or better yet combine both the 2 sites into like icanhasfakeboobies.com or something like that, it will save me a lot of surfing time you know....

PS: I am not writing because i want to voice out my opinion about the whole thing, to be honest i wouldn't give a rat ass on what is happened in the blogsphere but since yesterday Cheeseburger Pink (not to be confused with cheeseburger eddy) asked me to enlighten her on the difference between blogging about someone and talking bad about someone, so this is it.

I am Trying to Believe

It was the very first time that I let Cheeseburger Eddy into this blog; usually I like to keep this blog from the people whom I am close. Maybe there are just too many raw emotion letting loose and blog post that have not been given any much thought before I click on the published button. But what just happened is maybe a case of me being drunk or just plain drowning in my current mood poisoning. Cheeseburger Eddy’s comment on my post are why are there so many destructive and hate post in my blog. It is like I am almost like one of those Goth freaks that hate everything in the world. Besides being someone who is engaged and is about to take the step in commitment, I should be blogging about butterflies and honey, cinnamon and rainbows, shit like that. But I am vigorously promoting self destruction, heresy and hate. Which boils down to one single question, am I ready for the whole marriage thing. To be frank, I have been pushing this thought aside, intoxicating myself with cheeseburgers and Hooters. As a matter of fact what I should be doing now is trying to see and believe that the decision that I have made is right.

The smell of waffles from just below the streets right where I use to work and she was the girl which I couldn’t keep my eyes. Fast forward a couple of months and now I am engaged with that girl. How could this be real, I could hardly feel. This is like a waking dream and I am trying to understand the situation that I am in, because there is nowhere to hide and now I am just kept trying to tell myself…

How to be Anorexic

Anorexia is latest trend that is spreading across the world, it originated from Ethiopia. Anorexia is not a fucking disease, but it is a lifestyle. It is something that you should embrace and cherish if you want to be one of the beautiful people. By reading this article, you are on your way on becoming beautiful. So I welcome to the world of the thin and beautiful… that is right I am talking about you FATTY!!!!

How to be an anorexic

Step one
Look at yourself in the mirror fatty and be sick with all the fats and excess meat that is taken over your body. Keep telling yourself you are fat and ugly. Ask your friends, but when they answer that you are not, they are merely telling a white lie just to make you feel better. The fact is you are fat and ugly, and anorexic is the cure to the fucking disease of being fat and ugly.

Step two
Hands off the food Fatty! Fuck up your relationship with Food. Make sure you get sick by the mere mentioned about eating, kitchens, cutlery, refrigerators, restaurants and another that has got to do with food. Eating is for fat people and beautiful people don’t eat. You do wanna be beautiful right?

Step three
Invert pain and punishment on your fat ass for even thinking about food or craving it. The best way is to pluck out some pubic hair every time you think about eating; if you have none, resort to using a rubber band and flick it on your nipples or ear lobe every time you think of food. No pain No gain baby!

Step Four
Hey, you are not just fat but silly, being an anorexic doesn’t mean you don’t eat at all; you do eat but you eat at a minimum. And the only food source of a true anorexic is air. Be sure to acquire the art of preparing, cooking and serving air for all your meals. But don’t overdo it okie? You don’t want air to ruin your diet right?

Master the above steps and you will be on your way on becoming one of the beautiful people. Remember you are fat and ugly, food is evil and every time when I person tells you that you are too thin and you should be eating, that person either mocking you or trying to make you fatter so that she gets all the lime light. Use this picture on the left as your target, happy trying!!!